What The...??/

I was setting up my sprinkler this morning, and I swear someone let their walrus out and he was barking up a storm. I don't know what type of animal makes this noise, but it was so weird! I even put a bra on, thinking I would go walk around the block to find it, but by the time I got the girls in their home, it had stopped.

Feeling Mute

I have not said more than 5 words to someone since Tuesday. That feels really weird. And the only people I have spoken to were in the "service industry", and it doesn't really feel like it counts. (Little observation of DC...the service industry isn't that great.)

Now I guess I should clarify that I spoke on the phone to my mom and my dad. But in person to a living human being, nothin'.

Now that I am back in town, I feel like I want to talk or see someone. More importantly, I want to cook! So if you want to come for dinner, let me know :) Ha. It is Friday. Kinda short notice. Whatever...drop everything so I can talk to someone before I go buy a cat.

CHANGING THE SUBJECT (my nose itches just THINKING about cat hair)
Some more observations about DC.

1. Very few wedding rings.

2. ANOTHER person asked me directions.

3. I saw the most entertaining jewish man on the train from DC to Baltimore. He was loud, large, and had one of the funnier phone conversations ever. If I WAS actually mute, he would've made me snort, similar to Goth Girl in The Breakfast Club. His conversation went like this:
"HELL-OH?" (very loudly)
"I don't care. You want spaggheti, or a macaroni, or pizza? I could go for pizza. Oh Franks. That sounds fine." (pause)
"You know if you have anymore of the kinnish, I'd really like that kinnish with the franks. If we do Franks we'll need more ______ (insert inaudible word of something that I may have NO idea what it was)."
"Oh our trip? Well I thought we'd talk about that tomorrow."
"You want to get some bagel? And something to put on it? Make sandwhiches or something?"
Then abruptly..."bye".
Now if this is not entertaining, I will say I was mighty tired and probably punchy.

4. Arlington National Cemetery: I saw a funeral, heard the gun shots, and then saw the army wheel in three HUGE guns on wheels, and heard those fired when I was leaving. And the guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier was hot, like handsome, but probably sweaty too. Some wise owl told me that they had identified the remains of the unknown soldier. In no way did they notate this at the Tomb. Makes me wonder if they buried that guy with his name and such, and replaced it with remains of ANOTHER unknown. I'm sure there are MORE!

Observations from DC

1. Why does the EPA building take up so much Environment? It is ENORMOUS
2. Indian food tastes the same in DC as it does in Ohio. Good job Amul India.
3. I saw a little person today and TWO albinos. Oh the diversity here!
4. TWICE people asked ME for directions. So thrilled that I look like I belong.
5. I don't think I have ever crossed so many streets in one day in my life. People told me to take mace; seriously, the danger of being HIT crossing one of the bajillion streets seems much greater!
6. Walking by George Washington Hospital and Medical School makes me want to be a doctor. Uh, little late, yah?

Having a great time!

Kristy Queen of Water

The last three days of my Summer of Kristy has been spent doing, among other things, watering my lawn, herbs, tomatoes, hanging baskets. It is hard keeping up with what they are saying could be a draught! And everytime the smarmy weathermen on the radio try and pacify the people of this lovely town with "ohhh possible thunderstorm!", I want to throw things at the radio. But as the only thing I'd have to throw is my cell phone, which is now surprisingly delicate and no longer up to military standards, I choose to just shake my fist and say, "ruuuuuue". Because no, it doesn't rain.

I went walking through the 'hood yesterday and my lawn is certainly not green compared to some. And my GOD some people have shade from large trees! Where did these trees come from? I have a tree, and she is pathetic in stature.

There was always a bit of a disagreement about getting a sprinkler system. It was probably that or a deck, and the deck won out. Now that I am the sole owner of this establishment, I am very pleased that the DECK does not cost an extra 200 a month, as the emmense amount of water probably would've. Likewise, I am not scampering about on the grass; so it isn't like I need lush green under my bare feet. And do NOT try and scamper on this grass now, because it is a wee painful!

And with my new pedicure, I should NOT be walking barefoot out there anyway! So see! It all works out. The new color is called: "Sun-body Loves Me". I think I prefer "My Chihuahua Bites."

God Bless...

The Walmart checkout woman who told me, "You should have your husband do this for you," as I heaved two bags of potting soil, three hanging baskets, 4 pots, and 6 vegetable plants onto the scanner.

My response, "If I had one, he probably still wouldn't do it."

Oh disillusionment! Look what's become of me!

The Cycle

Losing, leaving, moving on...there is a progression of emotions, just like with death. I don't know the order of it all. I know one stage is anger. Looking through my posts, my anger stage was the first week of May. It really didn't last all that long. Looking over His anger stage from last year, I think it lasted 9 months. Not sure what that says about either of us. I suppose everyone is different. Or maybe I am indifferent.

I moved back into a sadness phase last night, while I was trying to fall asleep alone. It lasted 2 minutes, involved no tears, and ended with giggling. I think I fell asleep giggling, actually.

Because what am I sad about? What am I wishing would happen? It moves me back to my teenage relationships where it was just the idea of someone that was missed. Because what would have to change to ever make that relationship work? We would have to be two completely different people. Everthing about the past would have to be perfectly erased from memories.

There is nothing to be sad about. Person A and Person B should've always just been friends. Nothing about A or B was conducive for any relationship other than friends. And I thought that was the best part of our relationship...we WERE just friends first. And looking over what was best about our romantic relationship? Those things we had in common that could've always just been, well, a friendship.

Good Dates

It is so simple to write about bad dates. Writing about good dates just seems ridiculous. Writing about how excited I am about a person I met or prospects seems like a jinx.

And to talk about how "in the future if they read my blog..." seems like a huge jinx! This is what I said about dating and the FEAR. How do I sit back and not think about the future? Is there a girl out there that doesn't meet a guy, think positive thoughts about him, and then attach the guy's last name to hers?

I have a FRIEND. A FRIEND people, and I literally, in my head was like, "Hmm, Kristy ________? Nah, that would be weird."
(yes, male friend...)

Funny how blog entries start as one thing, and then move onto another.

Mmm, pizza.

I have to pee.

Okay, bye.

I am a Writer

If I counted the number of people that have told me to write a book, well, I'd still have a free hand, but still! People have said I should! So enter the dilemma.

I am an instant gratification type-o-person. If there is one thing my EX accused me of that I agree with, this is it. So when I have a great topic idea, or event, or story, I want to share it and get instant feedback from the blog world. But that leaves little to write about for, say, a book.

This leads me to be realistic. Do I really have that much dedication to write a whole book? Notsomuch. Do I have that much faith that I could come up with that much stuff to fill a whole book? Not even close.

So therefore, it will all come here, free of charge, for you people who read the blog, which I could probably also count on one hand. It still doesn't change the fact that I am a writer.

Yes, Personality Matters.

It has been such an eventful week, but by far the most noteworthy thing that happened is not the most entertaining. I'd like to share the most entertaining.

A friend of mine works with a guy, who is tall, cute, and supposedly someone I should meet. He, upon closer inspection and a face to face meeting yesterday, is not a nice person.

I was warned that this friend in the past had been known to call people "cute" who in fact had mullets, so I was wary of what this fellow would look like. After talking to him, he didn't SOUND like he had a mullet. And because he played Tennis in college, I figured the odds of a mulleted tennis player was pretty slim. The phone conversation was a bit confusing, and not because i was drunk, because i wasn't, but more because the reception was bad. So I went ahead and scheduled a meeting for Sunday, hoping that my initial gut instinct (this guy is a jerk) was false.

I am happy to report my GUT seems to be working.

I arrived to find him sitting at the bar in a red t-shirt and baseball cap, shorts and black Chucks. He had very nice calf muscles, but it probably comes from toting around his incredibly large ego and hyperbolic self perception. For a graduate of the University of Dayton, you'd think he played tennis at Stanford. And the criticism of living in Oxford was equally hilarious, as last I checked Dayton is not exactly a pleasure paradise.

Clearly this guy didn't care if I respected him, as he had zero respect for me, or any woman for that matter. He went on to say that he'd never play golf with a girl. That he never saw any of his three siblings graduate, eventhough at least ONE graduated from Medical School (but only Pharmacy, so you know, her 6 figure salary doesn't count). He called at least three things "retarded" and didn't stop there, as he hit the side of his hand to his chest and made noises as if to mimic a handicapped person. I didn't realize people over 13 still did this! And he paid for the bill when I was in the restroom, only because, "She put them together." and then "I don't want you to think I am a nice person or anything." To which I replied with, "I figured that out already."

A coworker asked, "But was he cute enough that it didn't matter?" Clearly this coworker was a guy. It could NEVER EVER EVER not matter.

So to summarize the more important events so as not to bore you all...
I am now living in my house alone.
I had my first day of work at a new summer job Saturday; it rocked.
Friday night I had dinner at a great restaurant and got a new book, bottle of wine, and chocolates from a friend of mine.
Thursday night my students did a rockin' job presenting their final projects, and the governor's wife came and loved the projects!