A letter to my soon to be ex husband...

Dear You,

I am so relieved that you finally made the right decision to let me know you were done trying. It really is the best thing, because living with someone, trying to be intimate with someone (eventhough I'm not sure you know what that word means), all the while hating them is really not healthy for either party. I guess I don't understand how someone can do that, knowing that the other person is trying. Is sacrificing things for YOU. Is wanting things to work out very badly. What does someone tell themselves in order to do that?

I am really sad these days because I am starting to hate you too. It wasn't supposed to be this way. We were supposed to start over. And we were supposed to be THAT MUCH stronger, having weathered things. It turns out, I weathered them, so that you could get even. I guess I know which person will be the better one after all of this. Which one of us will have more broken places that have healed and become stronger (citation: David Wilcox).

It is just so hard to heal with you downstairs. But I suppose you know that, which is why you are there. Yes, there YOU ARE (citation: Friends episode--Ross's wedding to Emily). Please just go. You've really hurt me enough already. Isn't that what you wanted? I guess after all of the decieving, I really don't know, do I? You lied in so many ways. I know so little. Does that make me stupid? No. It makes you a liar.

Kristy

Addition: Can I just say that I have been doing this for a long time...writing letters that won't be sent or seen. With the evolution of the blog, it will probably be seen by someone, maybe not THE person it is to, but it just feels that much better to be honest to all, not just yourself. And if someone ever wants to post one of THEIR letters like this, bring it! It is cathartic.